Madonna Can Zap Nuclear Waste With Magical Kabbalah Fluid

August 22, 2006

Madonna's Toxic Waste Fluid

London’s Sunday Times is reporting that Madonna once lobbied the government to clean up nuclear waste with a “supposedly magical Kabbalah fluid.”

“It was like a crank call . . . the scientific mechanisms and principles were just bollocks, basically,” one official said.

“She relentlessly pursued people,” said a former DTI civil servant. “She wanted to get this Russian scientist to explain this to civil servants.”

Madonna’s rep tells MSNBC that this was “old news”, having occurred years ago.

Is it too obvious to ask that if Madonna has had a magical nuclear waste eliminating Kabbalah fluid for years, why the hell do we still have nuclear waste?