Britney Spears’ Baby Gift Registry Includes $1200 Chandelier

Someone stumbled upon Britney Spears’ supposed gift registry at fancy Hollywood baby store Petit Tresor. A source tells The Scoop that it’s legit, but who knows. According to the registry, Britney’s expecting on November 11th.

A few of the items Britney would like:

• Airplane Chandelier : $1,275
• Bonne Nuit Crib: $2,200
• Bonne Nuit French Changer: $2,395
• Polka Dot Pink Rug: $495
• Baby Rosebuds Crib Set: $895
• “Ruffles, Roses ‘n Bows” Bassinet by Lulla smith: $1,100
• Berry Adult Glider with Ottoman: $1,095

Feel free to look at their gift registry and buy an overpriced baby gift for Britney and K-Fed at Petit Tresor.

Jessica Simpson Tries To Kiss Britney’s Belly

At last Sunday’s Teen Choice Awards, Jessica Simpson supposedly asked Britney Spears if she could kiss her pregnant belly. Britney, uncharacteristically showing some class, told Jessica “Hell no!”

A witness tells US Weekly, “Jessica was really insulted, but Britney refused to let her do it.”

Britney Spears To Be Buried With Dog

Contact Music reports that when Britney Spears dies, she wants to be buried with her dog. The pregnant pop star says:

“Lucky is just so cute. Mom sometimes looks after when I’m away, but I really miss her. And you know how the Pharaohs used to get buried with things they love? I want to do that with Lucky. She should be laid to rest with me when the time comes.”

K-Fed Admits “Criminal Mischief”

In a new interview with GQ magazine, Kevin Federline admits that he used to make money through “criminal mischief.”

GQ’s Mickey Rapkin told Extra TV that “[Kevin] delivered pizzas, but also admits he made money through what he calls criminal mischief. He appears to be remorseful about the criminal mischief but admits that’s where he came from and had to make ends meet.”

A few other early highlights released from the interview:

• Kevin says, “I don’t rely on my wife’s money. I don’t get any money from my wife.”
• Kevin says he and and Britney split the cost of his Ferrari 50/50.
• Kevin admits that he’s currently broke. He claims to have made $2 million from their UPN show “Chaotic.” He spent $200,000 on Britney’s ring and the rest on a home studio and making his album.

K-Fed Gets Paid By The Kid

We knew there had to be a logical reason why Kevin Federline keeps knocking up Britney Spears.

A source tells MSNBC, “Before he got married, Kevin was sitting down with lawyers, discussing legal and financial issues. He was sitting sort of slumped over with a baseball cap over his eyes and a lawyer was talking about how he had to sign a pre-nup and Kevin looked sort of bummed out. But then the lawyer explained that for every child the two of you have together, you would receive X amount of dollars. His eyes really lit up.”

Sean Preston Responds To Esquire

US Weekly reported today that Esquire magazine has named Britney and K-Fed’s son, Sean Preston, as the “Worst Dressed Man in the World.” Okay, I’m all for ripping on Britney and K-Fed, but this seems a little much. Luckily we were able to get a statement from Sean P himself.

Sean P. says, “Look, I’m like one year old and in case you didn’t notice, I can’t really dress myself. How do you expect me to look when I have two of the world’s trashiest people picking out my clothes? I’d like to present to the public, Exhibits ‘A’ and ‘B’. Like I’ve always said, ‘If my parents dress like s–t, then you must acquit.’”

Britney Can’t Unlock Her Car

A video of Britney Spears, unable to unlock her vehicle. The paparazzi have to assure Britney that, yes, it is her car and she is just pressing the wrong button.

Check it out here. (I’m having problems embedding YouTube videos, sorry!)

If You Didn’t Think Britney Could Act Dumber…

Then watch this YouTube video. It’ll be the best three minutes of your day.